Looking after children is not a simple matter, one has to balance punishment, reward, encouragement. Too much of one could cause a huge amount of set back in the future of the children.
This article is the continuation of the first series of 10 wonderful things about looking after children.
6. Kissing Children
‘A’isha said, “A bedouin came to the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and asked, “Do you kiss your children? We do not kiss them.’ The Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Can I put mercy in your hearts after Allah has removed it from them?'”
Abu Hurayra said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, kissed Hasan ibn ‘Ali while al-Aqra’ ibn Habis at-Tamimi was sitting with him. Al-Aqra’ observed, ‘I have ten children and I have kissed any of them.’ The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, looked at him and said, ‘Whoever does not show mercy will not be shown mercy.'”
7. The parent teaching adab and his duty towards his child
Numayr ibn Aws said, “They used to say, ‘Correct action is a gift from Allah, but adab comes from the parents.”
An-Nu’man ibn Bashir said that his father had carried him to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace. He said, ‘Messenger of Allah, I testify to you that I have given an Nu’man such-and-such. (It was a slave). The Prophet asked, “Have you given each of your children the same”?” “No,” he replied. He said, “Then testify to someone other than me.” Then the Prophet
asked, “Do you not want to show equal kindness to all of them?” “Indeed I do,” he replied. He said, “Then do not do it.”
8. The dutifulness of a father to his child
Ibn ‘Umar said, “Allah has called them the ‘dutiful’ (al-Abrar) because they are dutiful (birr) to their parents and children. Just as you have a duty which you owe your parent, so you have a duty which you owe your child.”
9. Someone who does not show mercy will not be shown mercy
Abu Sa’id that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Someone who does not show mercy will not be shown mercy.”
Jarir ibn ‘Abdullah said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Allah will not show mercy to someone who does not show mercy to people.”
‘A’isha said, “Some bedouins came to the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace. One of their men said to him, ‘Messenger of Allah, do you kiss children? By Allah, we do not kiss them.’ The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Can I put mercy in your hearts after Allah has removed it from them?'”
Abu ‘Uthman reported that ‘Umar wanted to appoint a man as governor. The governor said, “I have such-and-such a number of children and I have never kissed any of them.” ‘Umar said, “Allah Almighty will only show mercy to the kindest of His slaves.”
10. Mercy consists of a hundred parts
Abu Hurayra reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “Allah Almighty has divided mercy into one hundred parts. He kept ninety-nine parts and sent down one part to earth. Because of that one single part, creatures are merciful to one another so that even the mare will lift its hooves away from its foal so that it does not trample on it.”
10 wonderful things about looking after children – part 1
Source: Al-Adab al-Mufrad by Al-Bukhari